And then... (bare with me here. I am a pacifist and while I do have anger in me for the Braves, I would not do such a thing) someone also chops off Dale Murphy's head and sticks it on the aforementioned tree trunk.
Well, you would get this:

Look at that neck. Dale is smiling but his neck is not. It is saying, "I will destroy you." Obviously I translated that from the original tree trunk neck language.
Murphy was known as one of the nice guys in the league but I think he was over compensating for the ferocity of his neck.
Dale Murphy hit the first Major League home run I ever saw live. That was not enough to sway my fanship in the early 80's. The Braves sure were bad back then!
He had 7 undeniably awesome seasons, winning back-to-back MVP's in '82 and '83. He was a workhorse until injuries "Mattinglyed" him late in his career. His 30/30 season in 1983 was only the 7th in baseball history. Wow.
Murph is an almost HOFer. But if Jim Rice and Andre Dawson get in, then so should Murphy.
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